My Lifeworld, Yours, and Ours
Husserl and Buber in Practical Philosophy
We can share a room without experiencing the situation in the same way. An older woman and a professional from the local authority are sitting at the kitchen table. They are discussing home care services. The professional wants to establish what help the woman needs. The woman is concerned about who will enter her home, when they will arrive, and whether she can still decide how her day begins. Both want her to live well. Yet they may understand good care differently.
Edmund Husserl and Martin Buber can help us understand this encounter from two different perspectives. Husserl examines the lifeworld as the shared horizon of meaning within which experience unfolds. Buber examines how we enter into a relationship with another person. I would argue that these perspectives complement one another without being reducible to a single account: good practice requires both an understanding of the situation as it is lived and an openness to the person we encounter within it. This is the practical interpretation offered in this essay, rather than a theory the two thinkers developed together.
Husserl: The Home as It Is Lived
For the professional, the kitchen is also a place where needs can be assessed. Can the woman prepare meals? Is there a risk of falling? Does she need help with cleaning? For the woman, the kitchen is where she has begun her day for many years. She knows the light across the table and the sounds from the courtyard. Making her own breakfast may be a small act that affirms her continuing control over everyday life.
This imagined example offers a way into Husserl’s concept of the lifeworld. The lifeworld is the world that already appears as meaningful in experience and action. It is also the ground from which scientific concepts and methods arise. The meaning of the kitchen is therefore more than a personal addition to a room that could otherwise be fully described through its measurements and functions.
In The Crisis of European Sciences and Transcendental Phenomenology, Husserl criticises the way objectifying science forgets its origins and its foundation of meaning in the lifeworld. Mathematical and scientific idealisations can then be treated as reality itself, while the experienced world that makes them possible recedes into the background.
Applied to the kitchen table, this does not mean rejecting assessment. The information gathered may be essential to providing appropriate care. But the professional’s account must remain open to examination in light of the life it concerns. If help with breakfast means that the woman has to get up at a time she has not chosen, the service has a significance that is not captured simply by recording that her need has been met.
The expressions my lifeworld, yours, and ours also need clarification. For Husserl, the lifeworld is a shared horizon experienced from different subjective standpoints. Intersubjectivity names the connection between experiencing subjects that is fundamental to a world valid for more than me alone.
In this account, I therefore use mine and yours to refer to different perspectives within that shared horizon, rather than to two closed worlds. When I say that your lifeworld reminds me that my perspective does not exhaust the situation, this is my own interpretation for explanatory and practical purposes. It turns Husserl’s inquiry into an invitation: find out what the situation means from the other person’s standpoint.
Buber: The Person Sitting Across from Us
Buber’s question brings us closer to the relationship itself. The professional may understand much about the woman’s everyday life and still conduct the conversation in such a way that her answers become mere information for an assessment whose conclusion has already been reached.
In I and Thou, Buber distinguishes between I–It and I–Thou as fundamental ways of relating. In I–It, we describe, assess, and organise. This attitude is necessary. The professional must be able to distinguish between needs, consider alternatives, and draw up a plan. The danger arises when I–It becomes the sole mode of relating, so that the person can appear only as someone to be assessed and managed.
I–Thou names a different fundamental attitude. The other encounters me as someone with whom I am myself in relationship. This involves more than a friendly conversational style. A warm tone can accompany a decision that gives the other person no real opportunity to influence it.
Buber describes the encounter with Thou as something that comes to us through grace. The encounter cannot be produced through the right technique or an act of will alone. My openness gives me no control over the other person’s response. In a practical context, I interpret this as a limit to any method: we can work on our own presence, but we cannot guarantee that the other person will feel truly met.
At the kitchen table, the woman may say that she would rather make breakfast herself, even if it takes a long time. Her answer may unsettle the professional’s initial assessment. Meeting her means allowing that disruption to matter. What is she trying to preserve? Is there a form of assistance that would support it? The conversation needs room for understanding to change.
Together: Understanding, Power, and Responsibility
Buber also found resonance in Husserl’s thinking. In his reflections on what a human being is, he highlights Husserl’s understanding of our connections to generations and society. A human being cannot be fully understood as an isolated individual. Their thinking touches here, even though they ask different questions.
This connection matters for practice because the woman at the kitchen table is neither an isolated individual nor simply a member of a category. Her possibilities are shaped by her home, her body, her relationships, and the services available to her. At the same time, she is the one who will live with the assistance after the professional has left.
The difference in power brings responsibility into focus. The professional knows the arrangements, writes the assessment, and may influence which options become available. The woman may depend on the assistance and be unsure what will happen if she objects. The fact that the conversation takes place in her home does not necessarily mean that she sets its terms.
One concrete question the professional can therefore ask herself is: if she disagrees with my proposal, will that actually affect what I consider and recommend?
Another concerns the scope for choice: have I explained what she can choose between and what has already been decided? Listening becomes credible when it is accompanied by clarity about the possibilities available. Limited resources do not disappear through a good conversation. But the woman can be told where the limits lie and helped to express what matters most to her within them.
This is a practical philosophical development of these perspectives, rather than a claim that Husserl and Buber formulated a theory of home care services. Husserl sharpens our attention to the difference between the assessment and the situation as it is lived. Buber sharpens our attention to how the other person is allowed to emerge in the encounter. Together, they help us examine both our understanding and our exercise of the power that comes with our role.
Closeness does not give us ownership of another person’s life. Nor does a good relationship relieve the professional of the responsibility to explain the reasons for her assessments. Respect means that disagreement can be expressed without being interpreted as ingratitude or an unwillingness to cooperate.
At the kitchen table, the next move may be small. The professional puts the assessment form aside for a moment and asks what the woman most wants to continue doing for herself. She then allows the answer to shape the plan they are working on. Our lifeworld does not first become shared at this moment. But our understanding of it can broaden, while the other person’s life remains their own.



